Parshas
Shemos
By Rav Eliezer Berland Shlit”a
“And he led
the sheep after the desert.” (Shmos 3:1)
There is a
diamond and the diamond is inside of a box. There is a man who spends his
entire day renovating the box, polishing it and caring for it. But what about the
diamond itself? The main thing is the diamond! The main thing is the neshama!
The Torah
says that Moshe Rabbenu used to herd his sheep after the desert. What does this
mean, “after the desert?” What does it mean, “And he went after the dessert”?
What, Moshe went to look for better grass for the sheep to graze? Rabbi
Avraham, son of the Rambam says, “Moshe went in search for a desert beyond the
desert.” He was not satisfied with just any desert; he was seeking a desert far
from all other deserts, one that no one ever travels through, one that no foot
ever treads upon. Only there could he come to his shleimus –
completeness, to truly cling to Hashem, to know that “ein od milvado” –
there is none other than Him, to know that he has no ties to this world – the Olam
Hazeh – to anything materialistic. He wanted to come to self nullification
before the Supreme.
A person
must strip himself from all gashmius – materialism, and know that there is no
gashmius, there is no world – this world is a dream, it is no more than
imagination. The Zohar Hakadosh (in Parshas Shlach) says that in the future,
there will be nothing left of this world – nothing at all! Not one hair will
remain! No houses, no assets, no troubles, nothing will remain of this world!
As long as a person has even one memory left of this world, he cannot complete
his tikkun (rectification), unless he is given troubles and sufferings to
purify him from the lusts of this world, from the hallucinations of the Olam
Hazeh, until he forgets it all, until he has not one memory left of this world
(no connections or ties to this world). A person cannot enter the Olam Haba
(World to Come) if he has anything left from his body and from this world in
general. In the Olam Haba there are no houses, there is no food, nothing!
Everything is going to be completely different. The body will turn into a
neshama and nothing else will remain of this world.
A story was
told about “Rabbi Shimshon of the forest”, a Breslover Chassid who served
Hashem day and night with such passion and strength to the point that he
suddenly fell and passed away. One night, he came to Reb Avraham Berenyu, a
grandson of Rabbenu, in a dream and told him the story of his passing. “Reb
Nosson came and took me to Rabenu Hakadosh. The Rebbe said to me, ‘who says you
are a Breslover Chassid? You were in Uman, you went to my gravesite, you did a
messirus nefesh, it’s all true! But to be a Breslover Chassid is not so simple,
it doesn’t come so easily. I have a notepad here, let’s look into it and see.’
The Rebbe looked into his notepad and said, ‘it’s okay, you’re in my notepad,
so you are a Breslover Chassid. But you still smell of the Olam Hazeh!’ So long
as a person has something left from the Olam Hazeh, some point that binds him
to this world, a smell of gashmius, of ta’avas for this world (lusts and
desires), he cannot come to his place in Heaven. Two angels came along then and
took me to the river “Dinor”, a river of fire and immersed me. What can I say?
How can I describe the extent of the suffering and pain I experienced in that
river? Unimaginable and unthinkable. There is no such pain in this world.
However, the extent of the pleasure one feels after being cleansed in that
river is also beyond description. After immersing in the river, Reb Nosson took
me back to Rabbenu. The Rebbe replied, “You still have a smell of the Olam
Hazeh. Go immerse once more! One must have no faith at all in the Olam Hazeh,
no connection whatsoever to this world! Until the person rids himself from all
the impurities and contaminations of this world, he cannot enter the Olam Haba.
Reb Nosson took me to immerse once again in the river of fire. Upon returning
to Rabbenu, he declared, “indeed, you are now purified.”
We all want
a life of eternity. The body is just a box; the body is a box for the neshama.
Why did Hashem create for us a body? This is only to prevent the neshama from
going up (to Heaven) before its time. The neshama has no desire at all to be in
this world, it always wants to return to Shamayim, to its source. It has no
connection to this world at all. Again it is forced to eat, again it is forced
to drink – it is fed up! The person must eat because if he doesn’t, his neshama
will escape and return up above to its source. The neshama has no desire at all
to be down here! 120 years is all too much, as far as the neshama is concerned.
It can’t take anymore down here, it wants to leave. It will last until 120
years but only through eating. This is why we must look after the needs of our
body. Yet the body is really just a box for the neshama. It’s like a diamond
inside of a box and there is a person who spends his days looking after the
box, fixing it up, caring for it, that’s all very nice, but what will be with
the diamond?! The most important thing is the diamond! The main thing is the
neshama! Fix up the diamond! Polish it! You are a G-dly creation! Why are you
polishing up the box? Why? So that it will shine? You waste your life polishing
it, in the end it won’t shine anymore because you’ll have polished it too much.
Nothing will remain from the body – from the box. That box serves as a cover;
it is the cover for the diamond!
You must
seek out that diamond. Every person has two ways to go, as it says in the Torah,
“See that I have given to you life and goodness, death and evil… and you shall
choose life.” Does man really need to be told not to choose death?! Who chooses
death?! Rather, this is to show us that here in this world, everything is
confused, everything is topsy turvey. Death appears to be life. Materialism and
lusts appear to a person to be a good life, where as life – prayer and the
Torah Hakedosha appear to people as death! This is why the Torah warns us to
beware: What you may think is life is actually death – beware! You could die!
“And you shall choose life” – choose the Torah, kedusha and purity. Every
person is fighting long and difficult battles. So many people have entered
kedusha and avodas Hashem and many could not withstand the
nissyonos (trials); they couldn’t hold on. As soon as the evil thoughts and
desires enter the person’s mind, the person breaks and thinks, “Perhaps this
way is not really for me?”
What, you
have another way?! “And you shall choose life”, there is good and there is bad.
There is no middle. There is no such thing as, “This is not right for me.” If
you are not choosing life then you are choosing death! You might fall and leave
the Torah way, see forbidden sights, etc. That is why you must choose life.
Truthfully,
if a person wants to come close to Hashem, if he would just want this,
nothing stands in the way of true desire. Nothing can stand in the way of a
G-dly desire. Whatever the person desires, he will achieve, as Reb Nosson says
in Likutei Halachos, “People who wanted to get rich traveled to diamond mines;
they travel across distances, through jungles, facing Indians, across deserts…
most of these people were killed along the way. They gave their lives to travel
far in order to earn a kilo of gold or a kilo of diamonds. So a person won’t go
through such a messirus nefesh for the sake of Hashem? For the sake of kedusha?’
We can learn a lesson from the Sitra Achra (the Evil Side). Look how hard
people work for the Sitra Achra! University students sit day and night
learning, barely sleeping for the sake of nonsense, for a temporary world. So
we can’t sit and learn Torah for the sake of Hakadosh Baruch Hu? We can’t make
an effort?
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